Practice What You Preach
or
How I Got My Restraining Order

Only a few hours after writing the entry that is below this, I ended up sending this email to some kid on some site with personals.

"Subject: Not so good at this whole thing...

You look very familiar to me. I am sure it is just
from seeing your profile on here or, perhaps, on some
other random personals site. I know that I have meant
to speak to you before, but as stated in the subject
line, I am really not so good at this whole thing. I
noticed you are studying French. That is, rather may
still be, one of my majors once I am back in school
this fall. I am undecided. Probably will be though.
I guess it really depends on where I am accepted.
Hopefully, I will make it into Tisch at NYU for their
creative writing program. Who knows. Rambling just a
little. I apologize. Anyway, my point, I won't lie
and say that I did not notice your picture first. I
mean, I did. You are a very attractive guy. I also
cannot say that I think our souls are connected as one
on some ancient metaphysical plane, because I would be
completely full of shit. One, I do not even know you
or much about you aside from a brief description on
your profile. Two, I don't even know what that is
supposed to mean. Three, who the hell talks like
that, I mean honestly. If I have sounded at all
throughout this novella of an email to a nameless
stranger a bit wordy or flowery, I apologize. I am
working on a novel write now and have gotten into that
mindset. I know, it is kind of annoying. It is also
the reason behind my incessant rambling. I don't know
what the hell I am talking about anymore. Look, in
summation, I think you are very attractive, don't seem
crazy (though this whole assessment is bases on only a
handful of lines), and would like to possibly get to
know you. Which is also not to say that I am after
sex or a boyfriend or anything like that. You just
seem like you might be a cool guy to know and be
around and whatnot. Damned stream of consciousness.
Okay, I think I have terrified you enough for one
evening. Hope to hear back from you, but after
rereading my garbled verbal diarrhea, I would
COMPLETELY understand if you never did. Also
anticipating a possible restraining order. Okay
that's all. Well, other than my email address is
the cow says 'mooooo!'. Okay, now, that is all.

Later,

Preston"

So yea...and it is really not that I want to jump his bones or date him or anything. I really don't know him. I know that I have either spoken to him before or read several of his profiles in several places. Not really sure which. Either way, I guess that I am really not going back on what I said. I am just trying to find new friends is all. Stop looking at me like that, bastard.

Later Consuela.