Tuesday, August 03, 2004

Geris on the Verge

Last night, I was told that JT was seen at the club on Saturday wearing an epileptic seizure enducing psychadelic shirt, tight pants, and....pumps. That is all about that.

I got airbrushed yesterday soas to look like I have a tan and stop being so damned pasty. Unfortunately, I got it at 2pm. You are supposed to wait 12 hours then shower. So I was going to stay up until 2am. Normally, not a problem. However, I worked all night the night before, so I was running low on fuel. I fell asleep at some point during Biker Boys, which the lesbians across the hall said was a good movie, and woke up at midnight. As I knew I would not be able to wake up again at two for the shower, I went ahead and washed myself. I have a slight orange tint.

This morning I woke up at five when my roommate, Father O'Flannigan, came in from work. We sat around for a bit until he decided that we should go and have breakfast. We decided to go to, don't laugh, Cracker Barrel as I am now addicted to their Maine blueberry pancakes. So we got there at 5:50ish. They do not open until six, so we sat in the rocking chairs that they have for sale and waited for them to open up. It was really quiet. Almost too quiet, in fact. Out of nowhere, little geriatric men started appearing like termites from the woodwork or like Munchkins from the flowerbed. You would have thought that the nursing home had just let out or something. Well, this was fine, I mean the old still need to eat, but there was one in particular that gave me a weird feeling. He was sitting across and to the right of us in another of the rocking chairs which was placed almost directly in front of the door. He was rocking like a man on the verge. Like a man on a mission. Like a man revving his engine and waiting for the light to turn green. Pawpaw Pancake needed his fix. It had been 24 hours since he had had any bacon, and he was not going to let anyone get in his way of it. He was fiendin' for some sweet lovin' from her highness Aunt Jamima. He had it bad. He eyeballed the father and myself just beggin us to get in his way. He would let no man stand between him and his little slice of heaven on earth.
5:57am...He really starts rocking now. Glaring at us. Staring thru us.
5:58am...He has started hallucinating. Eggs and grits and oatmeal all calling out to him. He cuts his eyes at us once more.
5:59am...He is preparing for lift off. For some reason, he has decided that Father O and I are plotting against him and are trying to turn his dreams sunnyside down. He cannot handle it. He must destroy us. He rocks faster. And faster. And faster. His breathing becomes shorter, quicker. Heart rate more rapid, determined. We will not stand in his way, God as his witness! He starts squeezing the armrests. Rocking. Rocking. Glare. Rocking. Glaring. Squeeze. Squeeze. Rock. Rock. Glare. He is not worried about breaking his hips, they can be replaced. Nothing can replace his slab of ham. Rock. Glare. Rock. He cannot take it much longer. One of us is going to have to die. Either he goes or we go. He hates us. Rock. Rock. We must be destroyed. Rock. Rock. Rock. Rock.
He leaps from the chair and runs to the door. Father O'Flannigan and I look at one another and wonder, "What just happened?"

Oh yea I have a date tonight.

Later Consuela.

Monday, August 02, 2004

Oh Ellen

So I just started reading a prelesbian book by Ellen Degeneres, My Point...And I do have One. I love Ellen. She always makes me laugh like a madman. Well, as I know no diagnosed madmen, I can only assume I laugh the same way they do. I also must assume that they laugh alot. I digress. I went outside to have a quick cigarette and read. There were a few poeple outside. They were talking about the weather or tree bark or something, so I was able to easily tune them all out. I was reading a letter of apology that was written by Ellen to one of her friends. She was apologizing about having shaved the friend's dog. I found this amusing, but was able to keep from laughing aloud. When she mentioned the bathing suit, however, I blurted out the loudest most embarassing cackle I could muster. The lady sitting next to me looked at me as though I had offended her in some way. It was then that I realized that the context of their conversation had nothing to do with bark afterall. She was, in fact, talking about her recently deceased friend whose son had run his father's company into the ground. Apparently, I did not tune it out enough. I did, however, snuff out my cigarette, excuse myself, and go back inside the whole time trying to force my face to return to its normal pale complexion instead of its current hot pink.

Later Consuela.

Sunday, August 01, 2004

Was Headed for Bed When...

(Conversation I just had on Yahoo Messenger with a guy whom I swear is with the secret service or something)
Yah: Excuse me! I know yr ID by accident...and I read yr quotes in profile...they impress me much....I hope that I can talk to u, to listen to u, to share all things......Of course, if u dont mind......

Yah: pls answer me, yes or no,I really dont wanna interrupt u

Teeny: yea that's fine give me a sec though to get offline with my friend

Yah: ok, thanz for answering

Yah: hey there, have u finished?

Teeny: back

Yah: oh, thanks God

Yah: Well, maybe I have to introduce first

Yah: Well, Im an Asian

Yah: male 20

Teeny: Caucasian 22 in Mississippi, US here

Yah: Hope that u wont look down an Asian

Yah: Ok

Teeny: asian guys always say that

Teeny: why is that?

Yah: well, I dont know...Cuz when I try to talk to them, they......

Yah: I dont know why

Yah: But how abt u?

Teeny: i was just curious bc every time i have spoken to an asian guy online they always say something to the effect of "I'm asian. hope that isn't a prob"

Yah: well, maybe different cultures

Yah: and sometimes it cause prob

Teeny: oh well i don't have a problem with it if you don't

Yah: but if u dont think that is a prob, we can forget it

Teeny: okay

Yah: ok

Yah: u r so nice, lol

Yah: well, Im a student

Teeny: where?

Teeny: and what major?

Yah: well, Im in Vietnam, maybe u know this name, its so "seriuos" to many American

Yah: rite?

Yah: Im studying Foreign Trade

Teeny: cool i am a language major

Teeny: i want to learn 13 languages total

Yah: oh, hope that one day in the future, u will learn Vietnamese

Teeny: it is on my list

Teeny: of languages to learn

Yah: Foreign Trade also needs foreign language

Yah: well, so nice...and so surprised

Yah: lol

Yah: really!!

Yah: well, r u also a student?

Yah: I know Japanese

Teeny: will be in august or may have to wait until january

Teeny: but will be back in school soon

Yah: u mean in vacation now?

Yah: Im studying but now I have an Internship with a company, and maybe I will work soon

Teeny: I want to learn vietnamese, french, german, italian, portuguese, spanish, greek, american sign language, latin, japanese, any native african language, russian, and one more (undecided)

Teeny: i am working full time now in a hospital but will be back in school soon and still working fulltime

Yah: but, now how many do u know?

Yah: well. its so cool when u list Vietnamese the first

Yah: lol

Teeny: now? english, very little spanish, alot of french and some american sign

Yah: Ok, u need more time...Hope u will learn more

Teeny: yea i definitely will

Teeny: languages are my passion

Yah: And I hope that I will be your Vietnamese "tutor" lol

Teeny: i want to be able to go practically anywhere in the world and be able to communicate with people in their native language

Teeny: lol you may end up being just that

Teeny: i will need one

Yah: well, me too..

Yah: haha, Im always ready

Yah: well, dont know what makes me try to contact u,,,, but it seems that I have met a vey cool one

Teeny: thanks

Teeny: you too

Teeny: how'd you get my screenname anyway?

Teeny: my screenname is kind of unusual

Yah: well, in a chatroom

Teeny: oh

Yah: I told u that I dont know why...

Yah: maybe there is something, very splendid

Yah: lol

Teeny: lol

Yah: makes me talk to u

Yah: well, if u try to learn many languages, u should save money and travel

Yah: its better

Teeny: if i learn that many languages, rather WHEN i learn that many languages i will travel all the time

Yah: I have learned Japanese for 2 years but..

Teeny: no point in learning 13 languages if i am not goin to use them

Yah: dotn use it much

Yah: easily forget

Yah: ah, I see

Teeny: when i learn japanese, i will probably start speaking in japanese all the time

Teeny: i love japanese culture

Teeny: well i love what i have seen, read, and heard about it

Yah: so, Vietnam is a good one, cuz its very cheap to travel here, and u dont cost money for studying...Im yr "tutor"

Yah: lol

Teeny: lol

Teeny: i definitely want to move to a country that speaks each language for 6 months each at least

Yah: well, Im not kidding...I say true thing .lol

Teeny: that way i can perfect the language and dialect

Yah: u rite

Yah: Well, I love English but Im not so good at it

Yah: sometimes I feel hard to explain my idea

Teeny: you seem to be alot better at it than most americans i know who speak it as a primary language

Yah: ooh, is it a praise?

Yah: lol

Yah: thanks

Teeny: yes, a praise for you and a complete disrespect for most americans

Yah: well, u seem hate American

Teeny: don't hate Americans just like almost everyone else in the world more

Yah: hey, maybe u know Vietnam through history book, rite?

Teeny: yes i do

Yah: well, I know the relationship between Vn and Ame is not so good

Teeny: but i do not like history books that much. i think they only tell one side of the story and try to make America look like victims

Yah: thats why I feel hard to begin talking with someone there

Yah: America is victim?

Yah: I dont think so..

Teeny: well according to American history books, America is perfect and everyone else is always the bad guy

Teeny: that is why i hate to read about American history

Yah: ah, now I see

Yah: yeah, especially Vietnam, they look down us

Yah: But they dont know that we r always friendly

Teeny: i just think that if most Americans would actually read about everything that happened during wars to both america as well as the other countries, they would see that america is not as innocent and perfect as it likes to pretend to be

Teeny: exactly

Yah: Have u seen the film " Quiet American" of Phillip Noyce?

Teeny: no, is it an independent film?

Yah: it made in Vietnam

Yah: talk abt Vietnam war

Teeny: i haven't seen it but i will definitely watch it i love movies like

Teeny: just looked it up online to read what it is about

Yah: U can see in war, VN still show the best thing we have

Yah: in behavior

Teeny: have you seen Farenheit 9/11?

Yah: well, not yet

Teeny: it is an excellent Michael Moore movie

Yah: But I have booked at the film store

Yah: maybe next week

Teeny: I love him. he says and shows things in films that most people are too scared to talk about

Yah: i havent seen the film but I read alot in paper

Yah: I know much abt the gov'nt there

Teeny: it is really good. makes President Bush look like an ass

Yah: Iraq war, Bush, John Kerry...etc

Teeny: well President Bush made himself look like an ass. Michael Moore just turned it into a movie

Yah: u r rite

Yah: hope that all American have the same idea with u

Teeny: most do

Yah: the world will be better

Teeny: especially after that movie came out. most movies do not influence people the way that one did

Teeny: they wanted to ban it until after the election

Yah: yes, I have read abt that

Yah: Bush tries to fight agaist M Morre

Yah: anyway, this film has been showed in Ame.. Thats a really great thing

Teeny: bush tries to fight against anyone. are you familiar with the term inbred?

Yah: no, thats so strange

Yah: pls tell me!

Teeny: inbred is a term that is used to describe extremely stupid people. like when a brother and sister have a child together, aka inbreed, and it is mentally handicapped

Yah: I c

Teeny: President Bush is inbred

Yah: thanks for explantation

Teeny: or really really stupid

Yah: yep, he is!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Teeny: i'm Preston by the way

Yah: well, do yr friends have the same idea with u?

Teeny: not all but most

Yah: It seems that u love political topic...

Yah: lol

Yah: maybe I try to read papers more

Yah: to talk with u

Yah: lol

Teeny: hahaha i am actually not a very political person at all. I just started reading alot about it lately because President Bush aggrivates me so much

Yah: haha, I see

Teeny: and once i start talking about it, i cannot seem to stop

Yah: so surprised that u can share all yr mind with a so new friend- if u accept- like me

Yah: lol

Yah: ( haha,

Yah: 3et

Yah: 3++

Yah: sorry

Yah: mistyped

Teeny: haha well i will say just about anything that i have on my mind

Yah: ( let talk, I dont call u talkative,,,)

Yah: dont kick me!!!

Teeny: it will probabl;y get me into trouble someday

Yah: lol

Yah: so, what other things except language and polictic?

Teeny: well i LOVE movies

Teeny: and old blues music

Yah: ohhh. me too

Yah: but music is the most favourite one

Teeny: what type of music

Teeny: ?

Teeny: do you like i mean

Yah: well,Im a little different, R&B and altanative rock

Teeny: old or new alternative?

Yah: new

Yah: well, MTV is quite a new definition here

Yah: so I just know the new songs

Teeny: i like 1990's alternative, old blues, techno, some r&b, basically i'll listen to anything other than polka and country/western

Yah: well, I also listen to all kinds, as long as it is good

Teeny: that is a good way to describe it. i listen to anything as long as it is good

Yah: but,,,the favourite singer is Mariah carey

Teeny: really?

Yah: yes

Teeny: i don't like her

Yah: how?

Yah: ohhh

Yah: I waited for the same iead

Yah: lol

Yah: but

Yah: u make me dissapointed

Yah: lol

Yah: just joking

Teeny: lol

Teeny: i used to like her alot but i heard a comedian making fun of her once and now i cannot listen to her music without laughing

Yah: well, but someone said that " Difference makes people love more"

Yah: I dont know how to explain

Teeny: opposites attract

Yah: ok

Teeny: well that is what paula abdul said anyway

Yah: well, u seem so PRO

Yah: u know all things

Teeny: hahaha

Teeny: yes i am a celebrity of sorts in america

Teeny: haha

Yah: Hope that this differnce cannot be a problem

Yah: between us

Yah: haha

Teeny: nah

Teeny: i do need to go to bed now though so i can make it to work later

Teeny: can i add you to my buddylist?

Yah: wow, I wait for that

Yah: lol

Yah: me too, ok?

Teeny: okay

Yah : really nice to meet u

Teeny: it was nice meeting you

Yah : me tooo

Teeny: we'll talk later okay

Yah: hope to see u soon

Yah : TAKE CARE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Teeny: you too

Teeny: goodnight
By the way, Ruby is out of the hospital and doing well. She says thanks for all the prayers and cards that no one sent her.

Organ and I never hooked up.

Later Consuela!

This is my new Boo Posted by Hello